Regret is one of the darkest human emotions, along with guilt and shame. It is inevitable to feel and experience these emotions in our lives, and mostly it happens after we make a bad decision. If asked, most of us would want to go back to a particular time and try to rewind or delete that. Most of us fall into some prevalent mistakes while making decisions that take us down the spiral. Although the aforementioned emotions make a part of our life, you can only try to control these emotions. In this blog, we briefly discuss why we regret and what we can do while making decisions that we do not regret in the future.
Why do we regret?
No one can ever predict exactly the future, and every decision you take shapes your future somehow. There will definitely be something different from what you predict. Regrets seem like a part of everyone’s life. For example, the fight you wish had not had, the job you did not take, the choice of the wrong course or college, etc. It can vary from big to small. For example, choosing the wrong career is considered a big deal as it will change your whole life, and this regret can be permanent. On either side, choosing the wrong outfit for a party is considered as small or short-term regret. Marcel Zeelenberg, an economic psychology scholar, defines regret as “the negative, cognitively based emotion that we experience when realizing or imagining that our present situation would have been better had we acted differently… Because of this cognitive process of comparing outcomes to ‘what might have been’ regret has been called a counterfactual emotion.”
How to avoid regret while we make decisions?
Follow the decision-making process
It would be best if you made your decisions after the following process. Firstly you have to clear yourself about your goals or thing you are making decisions for. The decision will always be taken for your future, and the future is very uncertain, you have to take all the possibilities with you. After that, you have to think about various solutions to your problem. There is never only one solution to a problem. You should identify various alternatives of decisions for your problem. You have to closely examine all the alternatives and get all the pros and cons of each alternative decision. Eliminate, which all are not suitable for you. Decide on the most suitable alternative for you and start following it. This is one of the best ways to make decisions.
Face the truth
It would be best to make decisions for yourself while considering your goals and your capabilities to do so. Always think of reality and situation while making any decisions. Most people keep the truth aside at some point in time because those truths are scary and difficult to accept. From whom are you hiding the truth? Decisions will be yours, results will be for you, and the consequences you have to suffer. Therefore, you are the only being fooled that too by your own self.
Look at the long term
If it’s about the short term, you can make your decisions quickly. But always take your time to make decisions for long term goal. You should properly give time to your decisions and think is this good solution, or it can really help you out and beneficial for the long term. Try to figure out all the consequences, results, and what you have to do after making such a decision. Many decisions will make you suffer some pain in the short term, but that’s not permanent. Temporary pain always worth following long-term good decisions.
Do the death-bed test
Ask yourself if, on your death bed, you would regret any of your decision. This states that most regret comes when we do not do something as compared to when we do. Mainly the greatest regrets come when you let go of the chance to achieve what you want.
Overly focused blinds the brain
Yes, being focused and stick on to something is good, but letting yourself be blind or see other things also is not. You should always complete your picture while checking what is going on around you rather than sticking to just one point. You should be aware of what’s around you.