There is a big debate which has been around for a long time now in the area of happiness. Are we as modern-day humans with all the social and scientific advancements happier than our human ancestors? We don’t have an answer to this question yet. But all we can say is that finding happiness is an inside job. There are people who are not currently engaged in their dream jobs, they do not reside in their desirable house and do not even own a vehicle, but they are still extremely happy. Therefore, regardless of how bad the external situation is, it is always up to you to not use it as an excuse to choose self-pity instead of embracing happiness.
Having realization of your self-worth and acknowledgment of the fact that you are worthy of being happy, is the key to real happiness and leading to a fulfilling and joyful life.
Steps to increase Self-Esteem and find inner happiness
Now we know the true secret of happiness that it is an inside job. Sometimes we need to tweak our self-esteem so that we can experience self-worth. Following are some steps that can help you increase your self-esteem and find inner happiness:
1. Probe to know yourself better
First of all, you need to acknowledge all the strengths and weaknesses you have. Even unearth the things you did not know you have. A simple way to probe is to ask relevant questions like-
- How do I describe myself:
- How I see others describing me:
- What are the activities that help me relax:
- My top goals:
- My road map to achieve the set goals:
- 3 new areas I would like to explore for myself:
- Places I would love to visit:
- Skills I want to learn:
- If a genie grants me 3 wishes, I’d wish for:
- Things about me right now that I will miss in the hindsight:
While you look within to answer the aforementioned question. Mull over and feel, which of the question is making you feel happy? Which one is important in particular? Take some time out for yourself and try to figure what kind of a person you really are.
2. Try and Eliminate Negativity
Look out for things that suck out your positive energy and prevents you from being happy. It could be in the form of bad habits or even negative people in your life. The negative thoughts you have yourself are the biggest culprit and source of the negative emotions in your life. Refrain from getting caught up in these negative train of thoughts or let them consume you.
Use a piece of paper and write down the sources of all the negativities that are there in your life. A simple act of writing many times makes you aware of a lot of things and lets you tackle the problem head-on!
3. Use Positive Affirmation
Tell yourself good things about yourself. The world we live in and especially social media has no filter what so ever. Anyone from anywhere can comment on things in whichever way they want. Therefore, it is of utmost importance that at least you be your best friend and tell yourself good things. It might sound silly at first, but it is a very effective technique. Try the following positive affirmations:
- I can do hard work
- I am worthy
- My opinion of myself matters the most
- I am not scared of standing up
- With every passing day, I am getting closer to the best version of me
- I am an honest person
4. Look out for Support
Ask a friend or family member for additional assistance to help you reach your goals. Maybe seek help from a therapist if you feel you have some tough things you would like to deal with. We all need help and life can not be lived all alone. If you have not found your tribe yet, who is there to help you in their capacity, put yourself out there to meet these people. Trust me, it will be worth the efforts.
5. Reflect Gratitude
There is some good to be found even in the worst days of all. Even the days where you think there is nothing to smile about or are terrible have something in them to be grateful for. The only tough job here is to come in the habit of being grateful for things in general. It is funny in a way that the more you see into it the more you are gonna experience it.
You can start doing it by simply writing three things you are grateful for at the end of everyday. This will bring you in the habit of finding silver linings in the darkest of the clouds.