To conquer fear is the beginning of wisdom.
Bertrand Russell
Fear is that one emotion that has made it possible for us humans to come this far. It is an alarm system embedded in all of us to gauge our environment and often act on it. Fear is necessary like I mentioned earlier, but most of the fears we have right now is of the things that we have not yet confronted. Somethings we think might happen in the foreseeable future. But, I found most of the fear to be baseless and purposely set to exploit it.
Fear in the social fabric
The media and a lot of other institutions understand the science of fear and constantly try and manipulate it. Especially in the time of crisis, like at the beginning of the coronavirus pandemic, we saw media putting out headlines like “Will corona reach your neighborhood?” Attempts like these, incite fear in us. Even the marketing people know how to tap into your fears and make you buy the products they wish to sell. Politicians too stir up your fears to accumulate votes and religious leaders to increase their follower base. Parents also do instigate fear to make their kids behave properly. Fear is deeply woven in our social fabric and is impacting our lives more than it ever did.
How can you set yourself free of fears?
1. Acknowledge
To me, personally, this is the most important step to get fears out of your head. All of us have fears in our minds. It stays in the background, unnoticed, unacknowledged. We constantly try and ignore its existence but it remains there, spreading its roots deeper in you. Therefore, acknowledging alone is a big leap to fight the fears in you.
2. Jot Down
Write your fears on a whiteboard or preferably a piece of paper. After you have acknowledged its existence, it is the time we identify the fears properly and address it. When you write your fears down, it comes to the surface from the back of your mind, where it had control over you. After you have written it down, you have it outside you, where you have more control over it. This is why externalization alone is very important. Now you can crumple that piece of paper and throw it in the dustbin or stick on your fridge to remind you of your enemy.
3. Feel it
The reason why we are reluctant to have this fear out there in the first place is that we are ashamed of it. Know that even the strongest person in the world has fears as you do. There is nothing to be ashamed of it. Allow yourself to feel every bit of it. Try and take a dip the ocean of your fear. You will realize that the thought of indulging with your fear is the worst and not the thing that you fear.
Introspect
Now that you have had a stench of your fear. It is time you introspect. Ask yourself the question “what is the worst that can happen?” If you are fearing to change your career path, what is the worst that can happen? you will fail, you would get another job, you will continue to live. Are you fearing rejection from someone of the opposite sex? what is the worst that can happen? you feel bad, and then you would find someone better and you will live.
Take small steps
Conquering over fears is not a cakewalk. Therefore, it is important to take small steps that you are sure about. The process of overcoming your fear is overwhelming as well as intimidating. Once you are done with taking that baby step, feel good about your win. Keep doing this and you will be able to conquer the entire mountain of your fears.
Celebrate every win
Celebrating success while taking over your fear fuels to move forward. Therefore, it is important to celebrate with even your smallest wins. This is what will propel you in the right path. This is the technique that even Bill Gates used to build marvels. From MS-DOS to windows, word, presentation, and explorer. This is called the idea of a spiral of success. Build upon your success, and use that as a stepping stone for your subsequent success.
