How can you develop humility in your life?

We need humility in today’s world more than ever. With so much hate, rising narcissism, too much entitlement has poisoned relationships. There are clashes among religions and cultures, increasing differences between political groups, and hostility between different regions of the world. We happen to have forgotten the power and importance of being humble. We rarely see a civil conversation taking place between people who hold different points of view. Polite and productive disagreeing is no more a thing. People are constantly reinforcing others to see the world from their own perspective. We have placed ourselves into an echo-chamber people favor closed-mindedness instead of pursuing otherwise.

What is humility?

It is nothing but seeing oneself as the way you are- nor too big neither too small. Being too big means having an inflated ego and being too small means having low self-esteem. Being humble involve the following three things:

  • Awareness: Precise estimation of one’s weaknesses as well as strengths.
  • Openness: Ability to accept feedback and criticism with an open mind and presenting your point of view respectfully.
  • Empathy: a concern for others.

Why should we cultivate humility?

Although you don’t need any reasons to convince yourself to be more humble in life. It is not just good for your mental health but also for your physical well being. It stands just opposite to what all things we are seeing in the world right now.

Firstly, it enables you to engage yourself with the utmost honesty and open-mindedness. Also, it keeps your curiosity kindled. Secondly, it enables you to express yourself and your idea modestly. Gives you scope to praise when someone does something good. Or blame, when someone does something wrong. It increases happiness, bolsters relationships, and gain success on all other fronts.

Humility is not a new concept. It has been practiced for thousands of years by our ancestors. It is an ancient virtue that has been eroding, devalued, and overlooked with time. However, recent research shows that our ancestors were aware of the power of humility. The transformative power to change lives, work, connections with others, and society as a whole.

How to seek it for yourself?

Following are the steps you can follow to be more humble in life:

1. Look out for feedback

People who surround you constantly are the best judge of how humble you are as a person. So, it is best to seek feedback from the people around you. Make sure the people from whom you are seeking feedback should be your well-wishers and close to you. It is best if they are your parents, other family members, friends, colleagues, or the person you are in a relationship with. Try and have a healthy discussion with them in pertinence to the subject. Ask them how humble do they think you are. This will help you identify your very own blind-spots which you won’t be able to see for yourself easily. Know that being humble is a part of your overall growth so you can ask them how could you be more aware and open-minded.

2. Try not to be defensive

It is somewhat related to the first point. Always remember that being defensive to someone pointing out something in you is counterproductive. There is a strong urge to explain your action to someone when they give you harsh feedback, but try and avoid it. Instead, look at it as an opportunity to learn and grow. Like I mentioned being humble is also part of your growth. Next time when you think someone is giving you feedback in an arrogant way or are just displacing anger. Take a moment to affirm, embrace the process.

3. Empathise more

Empathy is the key to being humble in life. It essentially comprises of two parts. Firstly, looking at things from another person’s perspective. Secondly, genuinely caring for another person. When you empathize with others you automatically develop humility. Next time you respond to another person, think of the following two questions: 1. Why could the other person’s perspective (also) be right? and 2. Will I respond differently if I knew that the other person tried their best? Empathy can help you in ways you can not possibly think of. It breaks the vicious pattern of self-focus, making it easy for you to connect with others.

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